My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
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