Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I could make wine with my vomit
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Randomize
