question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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