Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
