What a fucking waste of an outfit
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
