The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
