I cannot find my penis.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
