I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
