"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize