Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize