real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i came on her dog
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
