Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize