I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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