All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
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