all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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