Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Duck Duck Cougar?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
