i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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