he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
