Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.