My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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