Barsexuality is the new black.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
