I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
