Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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