Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
