I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
