He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
