she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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