I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
