I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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