He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize