put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
