a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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