I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
