So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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