Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
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He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
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No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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