Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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