so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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