How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
