Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
