He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
