guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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