my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize