butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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