You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
