i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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