areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I did not marry a roomba.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize