Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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