I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
