Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
We have so much sex to catch up on
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
