I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
