He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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